


Home (If the Death Star Did Not Destroy Scarif)

by sugarcubeplease



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, F/M, Recovery, Romance, What-If
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-07
Updated: 2017-01-07
Packaged: 2018-09-15 14:32:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9239156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sugarcubeplease/pseuds/sugarcubeplease
Summary: An alternative ending to Rogue One where the Death Star doesn't destroy Scarif and both Jyn and Cassian are rescued by the Rebellion. Dives further into Jyn and Cassian's relationship, giving them a chance to explore their feelings in a way they were not able to in the movie because... well... they died. Begins with Jyn and Cassian on the elevator at the end of the movie and continues from there.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I just wanted to note that my purpose for writing this piece was to focus on Cassian/Jyn and what their relationship may have become if they survived Scarif. For this reason, there is very little detail on who came to rescue them and how, other than we know they were rescued by the Rebellion and the Death Star did not destroy Scarif. In addition, because I have only seen the movie in theaters some details may not be completely accurate. I am not 100% sure Cassian was shot in his torso or that his injuries were so bad, but I decided to roll with it anyway for the purpose of the story.
> 
> Also, all other character deaths (K2SO, Bodhi, Chirrut, and Baze) remain the same. I couldn't find a tag along the lines of "Some main characters live while others still die," but if you find a more suitable tag than EL/ND please let me know and I will change it promptly. :)
> 
> If you like what you read, PLEASE let me know because it is great motivation to keep writing. Also come find me on Tumblr, iam1withtheforce. Thank you so much again!

The hum of the imperial elevator mingled with the sound of Cassian’s harsh breathing. Jyn supported the captain’s weight on her arm and shoulder, trying not to let it show that with every passing second she grew dizzier and weaker. For him, she would fight through the black spots in her vision to keep him standing, if only for a few moments more. She owed him that much.

  
She glanced down at where Cassian gripped the side of his torso. The elevator’s blue lights made the blood soaking his shirt look black.

  
“You may need something for that,” she whispered, nodding toward the blaster wound.

  
Cassian laughed shortly, his warm breath tickling the side of her neck. “I’ve had worse,” he said, wincing. “Though the bruises from that fall might be contenders.”

  
Their eyes met then, and Cassian leaned in so that their foreheads almost touched. They had only known each other a short time, but Jyn already felt their souls were intertwined such that they could communicate full sentences with just a glance. _We have no chance of making it out of here alive_ , Cassian’s eyes said.

  
For a moment they were suspended in time, as if they were the only two people in the entire galaxy. Jyn inhaled the captain’s leather scent mixed with iron and saltwater, and she realized that she wished to stay in this moment forever. Here in this elevator shaft, they could remain enveloped in each other’s presence and warmth and just _be_ , never needing to bother with empires or rebellions or death.

  
Despite her wishes, the elevator doors shot open moments later. The blinding light that filled the compartment almost made her topple to her knees, but Jyn gritted her teeth and pulled Cassian’s arm tighter around her.

  
She focused on each step forward, fighting the exhaustion that was crashing down on her like the ocean waves she could hear ahead of them. Eventually they both noticed they were walking on sand, and with a groan Cassian slipped out of her grip and fell on his side, Jyn joining him seconds later.

  
There was no one in sight, no one alive anyway. Cassian rolled onto his back and coughed, and Jyn was suddenly gripped by a fear so real and intense that it shocked her senses awake: that she’d have to watch Cassian die, and then there would be nobody left for her in the entire galaxy. Her captain, the friend who had finally given her a home, was now leaving her. It was so goddamn selfish, but she could not bear to watch him go, could not bear to hold his carcass in her arms and feel that profound loneliness for whatever little time was left in her pathetic life.

  
“Cassian,” she said suddenly, shaking his arm hard. He barely stirred, his eyes closed. “ _Cassian_.” Her voice cracked this time.

  
Jyn sat up and scooped the captain’s head into her lap, trying and failing to stop the flow of blood from his side with just the palm of her hand.

  
Cassian’s eyes fluttered open and she thought she could drown in those deep pools of brown. “Your father… would’ve been proud of you, Jyn,” he said, his accent so thick that she almost missed his words.

  
“Now that’s enough, Captain,” she whispered, trying to swallow her tongue to hold back tears. “Shake it off. Stay with me, now. Stay with me.”

  
But Cassian closed his eyes once more, and Jyn was running out of ways to reel him back in. She used shaky hands to brush his long hair out of his face and pull him closer, the sand on his forehead scratching her cheek.

  
“Don’t leave me. Please. _Please_.”

  
But then she could feel it again, that dark exhaustion pulling her under. She gently placed Cassian’s head down and studied his face, trying to mark every detail as the spots ate away at her vision and thoughts. She couldn’t remember how, but suddenly her temple was resting against the hot sand. Mustering her last bit of strength, she tried to reach out for his hand, his arm, anything at all to hold onto, but she couldn’t find him in the darkness.

  
As the world went black, Jyn Erso dreamed of a pilot navigating a storm, a pair of Guardians holding hands, a droid much too smart for his own good, and a captain welcoming her home.

 

* * *

 

 

Someone was lifting her out of the sand and carrying her. Her lips were so dry; what she would give for a sip of water right now. Why, she’d probably even drink the ocean water, if given the opportunity.

  
Ocean… sand… Scarif… Cassian. This was all wrong. She was supposed to be at Cassian’s side. She was supposed to be dead.

  
“Cassian.” She tried to form the name, but her cracked lips barely moved. The arms underneath her were cool and unwavering.

  
_Save him… save him. He deserves to live; he_ needs _to live if you can… if you’re able… you have to…_ In her head she was screaming, but there was no way to make a sound.

  
Perhaps it was for the best. Perhaps the person holding her belonged to the Empire, and they would torture her for information that she would never give until finally they would have to kill her. In that case, she could live instead of Cassian. She could take that for him.

But she still couldn’t stop herself from wishing someone would say his name.

 

* * *

 

 

The earthy smell reminded Jyn of when she was a little girl on Lah-mu; she’d loved to run through the grass barefoot and feel the dirt between her toes, and though her mother always had to wrestle her to take a bath, she found the smell of soap mixed with soil oddly pleasant.

  
“She began showing signs of consciousness about ten minutes ago,” said an unknown male voice.

  
“Thank you, doctor,” came a female voice, this one recognizable, but Jyn couldn’t place where it was from. She was still trying to string together basic thoughts and facts that were lost in the fogginess of her mind.

  
She sensed a presence close to her, and she fought against the heaviness of her eyelids until the world came into focus. First she saw the sterile sheets wrapped tightly around her, then the elegant figure sitting in the chair to her right. It was a willowy woman with white robes and short, auburn hair. Mon Mothma.

  
“Welcome back, Jyn,” she said with a small smile. “Your return was been eagerly awaited. We are happy to see you recovering so well.”

  
It all came back to her suddenly, and she had so many questions. But of course there was the one thing she had to ask first, the one thing that ultimately mattered more than even _him_ or anyone.

  
“The Death Star plans…”

  
“…were successfully transmitted from Scarif and are in the hands of the Rebellion.” Mothma said. “You and your entire crew are heroes, Jyn. We finally stand a chance at defeating the Empire.”

  
A weight the size of the planet lifted from Jyn’s shoulders as she exhaled, her heart beating more steadily. Someone was listening when she sent out those plans, and her father’s sacrifice would not be in vain.

  
But she feared the next question even more. She swallowed.

  
“Cassian.”

  
Mothma’s smile grew. “Captain Andor had a close brush with death, but we reached him just in time. He is expected to make a full recovery.”

  
Jyn squeaked – actually _squeaked_ – and she had to cover her face and bite down on her cheeks to hold back the tears of relief that had begun to well in her eyes. He had come back to her. It felt as if the entire galaxy rested in the palm of her hands.

  
“And the others?” She said, peering between her palms.

  
At this, Mothma’s smile disappeared, and Jyn felt the urge to cover her face for a whole other reason.

  
“It appears you and Captain Andor were the only members of Rogue One to make it out of Scarif alive. I know this must be difficult for you to hear…”

  
Jyn blocked out the rest of Mothma’s words. Her thoughts were lost on small details like Chirrut’s smile, Baze’s loyalty, Bodhi’s goggles… even Kaytoo’s obnoxious calculations, all here yesterday and gone today. The finality of it slipped through her fingers like water.

  
“I need to see Cassian,” Jyn said suddenly, pushing up from her pillow. Good god, her arms were sore.

  
“You can see the Captain as soon as you have fully recovered…”

  
“I am fully recovered. I need to see him now.” To make sure with her own eyes that he was real and alive.

  
The world tilted when she stood from the cot wearing nothing but a thin dress, but she tried not to let it show. She felt Mothma’s stare on her back as she walked out the door.

 

* * *

 

After much prying, coercing, and at one point almost threatening to take an infirmary assistant’s head off, Jyn finally found the location of Cassian’s room. Only the painkillers running through her veins kept her from sprinting through the doorway.

  
She walked in and there he was, alive, sitting propped up in bed with bandages wrapped up and down his entire torso. Various daunting machines surrounded him, but the window was open and the rays of sunlight falling on the cot made him look peaceful. Safe.

  
He turned when she entered and his dark eyes widened. His jaw dropped in disbelief.

  
“ _Jyn_ ,” he said, and there was so much awe and disbelief and happiness in the word that, _screw the painkillers_ , she was running to him.

  
She stopped just short of hugging him when she remembered the bandages and instead grabbed his hand, needing to feel the hard calluses on each finger to know he was real.

  
“Let me see you,” he said, his voice hoarse and desperate. Jyn leaned her cheek into the palm of his hand and moved closer to him. He used his other hand to brush the hair out of her face, and she shivered at his warm touch.

  
“The plans made it, Cassian,” she whispered, allowing herself to smile as he tilted her head and searched her face, whether in search of injury or to make sure she was real, she didn’t know. “We did it. The Rebellion will destroy the Death Star.”

  
But Cassian was still murmuring her name. There were purple circles under his eyes and his hair was a mess, but he still looked more beautiful than ever. He then closed his eyes and pressed his forehead to hers. Under his breath, he spoke another language she didn’t recognize, and the rhythm of the words sounded like a prayer.

  
Her face felt warm. “I thought you were gone,” she said carefully, trying not to let it show how much of a mess she was on the inside.

  
He opened his eyes, his face more grave. “I thought I was, too. I thought we all were. Did the others survive, too, then?”

  
His hands still rested on either side of her face, but Jyn looked down for a moment before meeting his eyes again. Her tongue felt swollen, and this time she was certain she was going to choke. Slowly, she shook her head. “No,” she whispered. “None of them. There’s only us.”

  
The captain went still and released her, and for some reason she once again felt desperate to reel him in, as if she was losing him all over again.

  
“Kay, Bodhi, Chirrut, Baze.” He turned to the window, shaking his head. “All those men who volunteered…”

  
“…knew exactly what they were getting themselves into,” Jyn finished. “We all were prepared to never leave Scarif, you know that.”

  
“I do,” he said softly. “But I led them, and I figured my fate would be theirs. It just feels… wrong, somehow, that they’re all gone and I’m…” His sentence trailed off, and Jyn’s heart contracted. “I was ready to die,” he whispered.

  
Cassian’s words stirred something in Jyn, and she could feel her composure crumbling. Maybe it was because she understood him so well, and maybe it was because there was a part of her that always knew the captain welcomed death with just a little too much kindness.

  
She reached out and turned his cheek to face her as she shook her head.

  
“No. You don’t get to say that.” Her words were solid and commanding. “We _both_ led them, and now we both carry their sacrifice for the rest of our lives. We continue fighting every day to make sure their sacrifice was not in vain, you and me, and that’s just going to have to be good enough for you, Captain, because you’re not going anywhere. Not today, anyway.”

  
Cassian laughed softly, and Jyn exhaled as warmth returned to his eyes. He took her face in his hands once more and he just looked at her, all of her, like he could see through whatever remnants of that emotional wall remained.

  
“We don’t leave when things go bad,” he whispered, a statement of fact.

  
Jyn only smiled. “No. Because this is home.”

  
And then Cassian pulled her close and kissed her.

  
It was different from any other kiss Jyn had experienced; not fierce and harsh, but slow and deep and sweet, like Cassian was trying to pour out an unspoken promise to stay by her side, and for once in her life she trusted that promise. They were together in this until the end.

  
She placed a hand at the nap of his neck and ran her fingers through his shaggy hair, trying to pull him closer while also staying mindful of his fragile state. She thought her legs might melt beneath her from the depth of the kiss and the way he ran one hand down her arm, snaking it around her waist.

  
The captain pulled away suddenly and winced, but kept Jyn’s face so close that their noses touched. “If I didn’t have a gapping hole in my side,” he said, sucking air in between his teeth, “this moment would be a lot different.”

  
Her neck warmed, but she only laughed. Cassian gently kissed her eyebrow and released her, laying back into the pillows and adjusting the sheets around him.

  
Jyn pulled a chair to the side of the bed and sat down, taking Cassian’s hand in both of hers and studying it as they began to talk about anything and everything. They began by sharing memories of their lost comrades, and then they talked for a long time about her father, Galen. From there, they talked about all of the things they never had time to discuss before.

  
When the sunlight’s warmth left the room, Cassian drew the top sheet from the comforter and draped it over her shoulders. Eventually Jyn began to doze off against the side of the bed, just conscious enough to notice the captain slowly running his fingers through her hair.

  
She didn’t know how long they had beyond today. She didn’t even know if they would make it to tomorrow. But she did know that this was where she’d be until the end: right at Cassian’s side, finally home.


End file.
